time for love
Karl Rove would have told me to say
it advice? Is it opinion? Or is it simply the monthly rant of a
pompous, over-the-hill windbag? Whatever it is, it's been happening
without fail since our very first year, 2001, when GZO Jones contacted
us from his Brazilian retreat and hinted at a literary pedigree
that reaches back to the Beats. So we offered him the job and he's
amused us while remaining pithy and religiously reliable ever since.
Plus, he works really cheap.
Dear Dr. Jones,
In your response to the question
about teeth-grinding, you mention various eras and
their relative turbulence vis-à-vis folks grinding
their teeth, noting that "the '90s had Reagan."
As a teen of the '80s I must ask: what do you mean?
Reading In Portland
You're not the only person to ask some
version of this very same question. And, um, I could say
the Alzheimer's is creeping in. Or that this month's shipment
of mushrooms had passed its expiration date. Or even that
my editors should have caught it. Or my shrink.
But, indeed, Ronald Reagan ran the planet
in the '80s, not the '90s as I wrote.
In reality, I was wrong. I have no excuses.
I did it. I pulled the trigger. I'm the one to blame. No
matter what I'd been drinking or with which mysterious companions
I'd been hunting.
It was the worst day of my life.
If I knew Karl Rove, that's what he would
have told me to say. And all would be right.
OK, I was flipping around the TV last
night and passed a show called "Final Destination
2." Now, by definition, shouldn't "Final
Destination" have been enough? If they didn't
get to a final destination by the end of a movie
called "Final Destination," don't you
think they should give it up??
Anthony in N.J.
Yes, they should give it up. And
you shouldn't watch so much TV.