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s it advice? Is it opinion? Or is it simply the monthly rant of a pompous, over-the-hill windbag? Whatever it is, it's been happening without fail since our very first year, 2001, when GZO Jones contacted us from his Brazilian retreat and hinted at a literary pedigree that reaches back to the Beats. So we offered him the job and he's amused us while remaining pithy and religiously reliable ever since. Plus, he works really cheap.

Dear Dr. Jones,

A few weeks ago a longtime friend told me that they grind their teeth when they sleep. All of a sudden I start seeing stories in the paper about it and then just the other day somebody else told me they do it.

So here's my question: Is it heightened awareness, growing trend or cosmic convergence? I mean, this is far from the first time this sort of thing has happened in my life.

Signed,
What's The Deal?

Dear WTD,

OK, so you've noticed. The world is a wonderfully interconnected place. Why do you think Tom DeLay is getting his comeuppance, along with all those Enron scofflaws? It's the same kind of karma, if you really think about it.

Do you believe life is a series of random events? A lot of people do. Yet there's no end to the possibilities when you hit that moment of clarity and realize: you get back what you give. The love you take is equal to the love you make.

McCartney was right. Corny but true.

We can discount the "growing trend" theory as a bit arrogant. The world has always had its proportion of teeth grinders and to suggest that current times are prone to more of this nasty nocturnal proclivity is to forget that the '60s and '80s were also very turbulent. As were the '20s, '30s and '40s. Even the '50s had their moments. And the '90s had Reagan.

To suggest that the modern era is more conducive to teeth grinding would be a mistakenly narcissistic conceit.

I think it's mostly a case of the other two – that story in the paper might have passed you by if not for your friends. Even so, don't miss the synchronicity.

– Jones

Dear Dr. Jones,

A while back you said that elections have consequences when somebody asked about Judge Roberts and the Supreme Court. So how about Alito?

Signed,
Judge Or Judge Not

Dear JOJN,

My opinion remains the same: Elections do have consequences and next time the American electorate would be wise to pay a little more heed. The world will be a long time digging itself out of the mess created by the last two national elections.

As for Alito, Bush and the rest of them, all I can say is look out planet Earth, here comes the military-industrial complex roaring toward us down the track.

– Jones