time for love
men are brothers; chicks, too
do old Beats go to retire? GZO Jones headed for Brazil. We've found
scant documentation that he can even keep a beat, but that has nothing
to do with the fact that Jones always makes deadline and, one way
or another, never shies away from a question. He likes to consider
himself some sort of missing link between the 1950s and the new
century. We like to consider that he works cheap.
Dear Dr. Jones,
I'm surprised you haven't weighed in on the question
of gay marriage ... how come?
Because everyone else is doing it.
You see, to exploit a terrible metaphor, an old dog like me
gets choicer cuts by letting the pups fight over the first scraps
that fall. That way the chances are much less likely that I'll get
It's hard to be in step with the young, and the more gratuitous
the "izzle" you insert into your speech, the less credibility
you have. How to circumvent this? Catch issues on the bounce, act
like you know what you're talking about and weigh in just after
it's not the buzz ... but before it's dead.
An old hipster's window of opportunity with young hipsters is
"short and hard, like a bodybuilding elf," as the song
So the homo-gays? I'm not the first one to suggest that if they
wanna be as miserable as everyone else, well, let them get married.
God bless their deviant souls.
Unless it's intended as art, who cares what goes on in other
people's pants? Like a certain underappreciated modern philosopher-king
said: "All men are brothers; chicks, too. That is all."
Dear Dr. Jones,
Is Martha Stewart guilty and will she really go to the slam?
Sonny boy, I imagine she is but I don't think it's going to
happen. If it does, though, I'm only human I wanna see the
prison-yard lesbian exploitation flick based on her story.